Author Topic: Gaming Horror Stories  (Read 3083 times)

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Offline Alfalpharius

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Gaming Horror Stories
« on: September 15, 2016, 09:19:38 AM »
So this is a fun discussion sometimes.  While it may seem 'depressing', I honestly feel like these stories are cautionary tales.  I hope this is fine- I would like to refrain from referencing people by name, specific locations, or anything of that nature.  I would like to keep in vague, simply because some folks on the internet have turned their personal stories into smear campaigns, and I don't want to do that. 

So, all of that being said- what are some of your 40k horror stories? 

Smugman's Glow: 

So, since I won't use names around these parts, I will refer to this player as 'Smugman'.  I call him this because his entire personality reeked of 'smug'.  He would do that thing where he talked over you or cut you off when you were speaking, and when he spoke he would close his eyes and move his head a lot with this condescending tone of voice and smirk that... well, made you really hate him the first time you encountered him.

At the gaming store we had, Smugman was always there.  Smugman had no life, he apparently had no job, and he certainly didn't have any 'friends'.  However, Smugman did have two things in droves:  Disposable income, and opinions.  And one was thrown into Warhammer 40k (and Fantasy, and pretty much everything, actually), the other was thrown at people who simply didn't want to hear them. 

If you were showing an interest in something (in other words, 'looking at it'), Smugman would talk about it negatively- and not just in the way that "I don't like that", but in a way that came out as "That is dumb, and anyone who uses it is also dumb".  If it wasn't something everyone was into, Smugman would always talk about how awesome it was and how 'dumb' people were for not being able to appreciate it.  (The little game was to see how much of a span of time it took him to flip things around- in other words, we would see if he could talk about how 'lame and overrated' something was to one person, and then how 'awesome and underrated' the same thing was to another person- record was a half hour). 

Smugman had tons of money- and no, I don't think that's a bad thing at all.  I don't know where his money came from, because he was always at the FLGS or other gaming events.  Constantly, Smugman always had the newest 'thing'- and if he had it, he probably also had multiples.  And the hilarious part was that he'd buy things he just outright said were 'dumb', and play it off and say "I'll buy it just to get on that level, y'know?" (whatever that means). 

Smugman also loved to brag, and when small games were going on- if a player said "Hey, if you put that into play, there's nothing I can do at all to mitigate it" (Baneblades were scary at the time, if I recall, and could dominate the table)- Smugman would go on about how it's not 'his fault' that players "aren't willing to seriously invest in the game".  Smugman also loved to go on about how great Necromunda and Mordheim were, despite never being able to explain why- and he'd go on about how 'dumb' players were for not hunting these games down and playing them more than they do now.

So, once you encountered Smugman- and I mean it only takes one time- you knew to stay away from him.  He single-handedly made most people quit playing at the FLGS.  And it got so bad, the FLGS put away all but one table.  That meant he was always there, at that table.  Now's the time to mention- if Smugman had decided to haunt your table, you could rest assured after everything you did- any move- he'd snort and shake his head (with his eyes closed).  It didn't matter what it was you did- or your opponent did- he'd always have a 'response' like that, and grab the nearest person to him and start making comments and pointing and chuckling.  If you asked him 'what?', he'd shake his head and chuckle and say, "Just keep playing your game, bro". 

And sadly- Smugman wasn't just a Wargamer.  He played, quite honestly- everything in the store... which, of course, somehow made him believe he was an expert on it and that his opinion needed to be liberally applied to anyone looking at anything in the store.

It became the unspoken policy that as soon as Smugman spoke to or about you/your purchase/your game, you packed up and left.  This started happening when people were shopping.  Finally, the store owner had to ask him to 'only come in to shop'.  I don't know what their 'connection' was, but it went on long enough. 

A couple of weeks later, there were three tables to game on.

 

Offline thrst77

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Re: Gaming Horror Stories
« Reply #1 on: September 28, 2016, 11:45:19 PM »
Oh my, That guy sounds like a good time. Did anyone ever just smash him and table him outright? What army did he play? Thanks for sharing the story and I am really glad there is no one like that at my LGS.
Make em do da burny dance!

Offline Alfalpharius

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Re: Gaming Horror Stories
« Reply #2 on: September 30, 2016, 09:42:07 PM »
Oh my, That guy sounds like a good time. Did anyone ever just smash him and table him outright? What army did he play? Thanks for sharing the story and I am really glad there is no one like that at my LGS.

Remember when Chaos Daemons were still a new (and very OP) army?  You can bet within a week he had that on the table.  But I don't know what he had or didn't have, I just know he was in the game for the 'win'.  He'd claimed to have 'shelved' thousands of dollars in minis because that particular army was 'useless' or 'cheesy'.

There were a couple of dudes that were like, "Yeah, I beat him and he whined about cheese the whole time during and after".  As far as his win/loss record, I don't know.  It does speak to the old saying that "Winning isn't everything", because no matter how bad or good he was- it was just poor sportsmanship.  Which is why to this day I will openly admit to my wins being countable on one hand (and I can still smoke a cigarette with that hand). 

Offline Alfalpharius

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Re: Gaming Horror Stories
« Reply #3 on: October 01, 2016, 06:48:53 AM »
Time for another horror story.  No one's provided one of their own, so I'll share one.

Sort of.

So...

I located a FLGS near where I was living, and was pleased to find that they had several gaming tables and hosted game nights on the weekends when the store was closed, because the owner was there hosting.  For a few bucks, he'd shut down his business, close his blinds, and let people come in the back door and game. 

Well, thing about it was, this was rare.  And I discovered why...

A couple of the times I visited, there was this mean little fat kid.  And I don't hate little fat kids or any other kind of kids, but this kid was the brat incarnate.  He was kind of loud and obnoxious on his own, and made obnoxious noises and was just generally that kid that you ignored and hoped his parent dealt with it later.  But that's not where this little grot shined, oh no.  The little grot really shined when his little pals were around- a couple of giggly scrawny kids. 

When his pals were around, the little grot would get worse.  He'd try to be 'sneaky' about shaking a table so that models would fall over.  He'd sometimes knock models over on his own and go 'ping!'.  I watched this little brat grab a model and pass it under the table to his friend on the other side, who put it in another player's box.  Aside from all of this, he was extremely disrespectful to adults and had a mouth fouler than most of the Marines I know.

He'd do all these things, players would see it, and look at each other with this "I hate this freaking kid" look in their eyes and just shake their heads and hope he wandered away.

He came up to me when I was holding one of the older Grey Knight models I'd just bought, while a guy was showing me how to 'pin' it (the old metal ones).  The grot starts grabbing at my model and grunting and whining like a baby, and I hold it away from him.  I got annoyed, turned to the kid and just said, "What the hell is your problem, kid?  Can't you see adults are talking?  Where is your parent?"

The kid doesn't buzz off.  He stands there, but he doesn't stand there shocked.  He starts to whine, then he starts to wail and bawl. 

Ever noticed this stuff happened all the time and no one did anything?  Because I found out who the kid's 'parent' was.  The store owner.  Now, you may be asking why I didn't figure that out sooner- but the answer is "because the store owner was of a different race entirely", and this kid was his step-son.   Moving on...

The store owner comes over and ask if I yelled at his son.  I nodded and said I did, and he immediately belts out "He has autism, you A-HOLE!"    Loud.  Very loud.  He doesn't have a chance to ask me to leave, I just start walking.  I don't even know if I brought that model with me on my way out.

Now, don't get me wrong.  I felt bad for a little while, but a while later I was at another FLGS and speaking with the guy that worked here, he'd said that he worked with this guy or for this guy, I don't remember- but he said the kid was a problem then and the guy refused to do anything about the kid's behavior because his wife was extremely coddling to the boy.   Not to mention, he was quite skeptical about the autism, because the kid was just always a brat and his 'father' never did anything about it. 
« Last Edit: October 01, 2016, 06:51:51 AM by Alfalpharius »

Offline Dirty Harry

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Re: Gaming Horror Stories
« Reply #4 on: October 01, 2016, 10:00:13 PM »
I forgot I had yet to share a war story in this thread. We'll call this one....

The DAH kid

Years ago during 5th edition when I was just a starting out in the hobby, one of my favorite things to do was to stand around tables, and quietly watch games. Occasionally I'd ask players questions about their army. At that time my brain was a sponge, I wanted to learn anything and everything. On this occasion I was watching my friend, a dark Eldar player setting up for a game against Grey Knights (two most powerful armies at the time oddly enough) and I was asking him about Harlequin. It's easily my favorite sub faction of the space elves and I was wonder what his take on them was. Without even getting a chance to answer another guy, we'll call him 'Special Ed', chimes in and says,
"HERESEY, noone fields harlequins outside of apocalypse!!"

Buddy of mine who introduced me into the hobby, an Aliatoc craftworld devotee, looks at him and just says,
"Oooookay,"
Special Ed then begins to flip through my friend's dark Eldar book and tried to make a case saying Harlequin are too point costed to serve the function they are built for and then insists they don't even have a save. My Eldar friend points out that they have flip belts. Special Ed has a moment of silence while he pieces together a retort. After what seems like an eon of quiet he doubles down, insisting they're crap. He leaves, my Eldar buddy turns and looks at me and says,
"Holy crap I was dangerously close to murdering that kid,"
"Dude, he looks older than you, and you're 24," I respond.
"DAH! DAH! HARLEQUINZ! HERESEY! CANT BE USED OUTSIDE OF APOCALYPSE!" he exclaims in exaggerated but still muted hush tones. I laugh like it's the funniest thing I've heard all week.

Throughout the years of my gaming experience special Ed occasionally frequents local shops, eager to loudly announce his lack of tact.
Don't try making a unit unkillable. its a waste of time and the dice gods laugh at you for wasting your time. Dedicate a unit to a job and make sure it does it til it's either dead or running.

Offline Alfalpharius

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Re: Gaming Horror Stories
« Reply #5 on: October 02, 2016, 12:24:12 AM »
Throughout the years of my gaming experience special Ed occasionally frequents local shops, eager to loudly announce his lack of tact.

We had a couple of guys like that.  Not as obnoxious or tactless, but a few had a lack of manners.  One dude in particular would raise his voice more than was necessary to tell you that you had a rule wrong.  He seemed to be under the impression that everyone playing 40k was a veteran, and getting a rule wrong meant you were cheating.

Offline Zggy91

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Re: Gaming Horror Stories
« Reply #6 on: October 02, 2016, 02:17:52 AM »
I have one. There is a player at my FLGS, lets call him Salty Sam. Salty a was a hard core guard player who bought in really fast and heavy, as in getting a baneblade within a month of starting to play.  Salty Sam was playing against one of the veteran players who had been collecting raven guard for years. He put a lot of love into his army and had a lot of custom converted characters. So Salty and the collector were playing a game, and collector had vanguard vets among Salty Sams tanks within the first turn, led by his custom built commander Shrike.  Salty Sam had forgotten his tape measure and collector was letting him use his, one of the massive skull shaped officially licenced  ones from GW.  As collector was passing Salty Sam the tape measure Salty Sam "accidently" drops it on Collectors Shrike.  Shirke survived the drop the first time and the whole incident was almost forgotten, until the next turn when Salty Sam dropped the tape measure on Shrike, again. Shirke was not so lucky this time, and i believe he had an arm snap of and was broken off his base.  Needless to say, Salty Sam was on most peoples --- list for months afterward, and he is still easy to trigger into a tantrum.  My favorite is being able to say "Stormsurge" and watch him flip out and launch into a long winded rant on how the entire tau codex is horrible cheese.

Offline Dirty Harry

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Re: Gaming Horror Stories
« Reply #7 on: October 02, 2016, 10:29:00 AM »
Oh, that reminds me of one of the few m:tg players that actually got permabanned from the flgs my gaming group used to use as a home turf. I'll call him Reggie Ragequit for the purposes of this story. The guy was a competitive player who had no grace in losing, even in practice games. He built up a high end aggro deck built to win by turn 6. The deck I had built wasn't even close to being as expensive but played smarter with utility. We played a game, and I was able to slow his tempo down easily with removal spells and cantrips that did damage to his attackers. I had a life gain support that could weather his burn damage. Even in games when he was close to beating me he could not hold his composure when he didn't draw into a burn spell to finish me off. I swear it was the same every time. He's get a stellar opening hand, and then 3 turns later would complain that his deck ran out of gas or that he was getting flooded with land. Playing against other opponents who wouldn't tolerate his shenanigans it finally got to the point where the owner had to LITERALLY, tell him to act like an adult or to show himself out. After a melt down one day he was permabanned and after he was kicked out the owner put up signs in the shop warning players that they will get a shop ban if they use any vulgar, sexist or racist language in the shop. I was friends with Reggie on Facebook for a little while. It was funny because later he tried to present himself as an outspoken intersectional feminist, being captain high and mighty. We all knew he was a tool.
Don't try making a unit unkillable. its a waste of time and the dice gods laugh at you for wasting your time. Dedicate a unit to a job and make sure it does it til it's either dead or running.

Online Izzycat218

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Re: Gaming Horror Stories
« Reply #8 on: October 04, 2016, 12:06:34 PM »
Worst time I've had was at adepticon. Nids were new that year and I was playing in the team tournament. First time I had ever been to something that big. The whole team were rules lawyers along with being WAC. It would seem that their list wasn't actually screened by the judges either for they broke list construction. My team got crushed due to new flying monster spam from nids. The only redeeming factor was they were disqualified after our game. Made my day seeing their faces.

All was not lost for the rest of adepticon our next opponents gave us beer while we played :)

Offline tyurtddr

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Re: Gaming Horror Stories
« Reply #9 on: November 02, 2016, 11:06:24 AM »
Moral of the story, in a pick-up game, say whether you want a competitive or casual game.

Pick-up game on a Saturday, 1500pts. I'm fielding a guard army, pretty soft, have 1 vendetta, no lemans, no allies, no formations. Hes seen me play the list earlier that day as this was my 2nd game. He brings a kitted out chaptermaster on a bike, a knight, a formation of 4 fliers from death from the skies (Ive never used the rules before), a mine squad of 5 marines and a min squad of 5 scouts.

Tabled in 2 turns. That was a few weeks ago, haven't been back since.

Offline Dirty Harry

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Re: Gaming Horror Stories
« Reply #10 on: November 02, 2016, 01:26:39 PM »
Hate it when that happens. It's why I ask before hand when I play a pick up game "hey, are we playing power lists or are we just doing something goofy for fun?" Fun games are usually when I don't bring 3 flying hive tyrants, two mawlocs, 2 cheap squads of gaunts and crap tons of zoanthropes.
Don't try making a unit unkillable. its a waste of time and the dice gods laugh at you for wasting your time. Dedicate a unit to a job and make sure it does it til it's either dead or running.

Offline Fritz40K

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Re: Gaming Horror Stories
« Reply #11 on: January 24, 2017, 01:10:07 PM »
We used to play 40K at a store called Comic Book Heaven...

More like a store that just sold comic books with one of the owners also playing 40K. Small little store in a mall with two 40K tables inside. If you didn't grab those, you played outside in the main walkway area on a fold out table. A bit noise, with people walking by, but the store had a cool player base and vibe.

One such player who played chaos space marines, and had an AMAZING Black Legion army- see below, was playing when a mom came over with her kid to watch and put the kid down on the gaming table...

...which flipped the entire table over smashing both armies.

Grown men can cry.
Though my men may sleep, and my ships rest at anchor, my foes know full well that big guns never tire...

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Offline BorntobeMild

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Re: Gaming Horror Stories
« Reply #12 on: February 12, 2017, 05:30:09 PM »
We used to play 40K at a store called Comic Book Heaven...

More like a store that just sold comic books with one of the owners also playing 40K. Small little store in a mall with two 40K tables inside. If you didn't grab those, you played outside in the main walkway area on a fold out table. A bit noise, with people walking by, but the store had a cool player base and vibe.

One such player who played chaos space marines, and had an AMAZING Black Legion army- see below, was playing when a mom came over with her kid to watch and put the kid down on the gaming table...

...which flipped the entire table over smashing both armies.

Grown men can cry.

Sometimes we get people that come into the stores I play at that are just there to buy a board game and it's their first time seeing a tabletop wargame. Some will come by and look but never have I seen somebody even come within 3 feet of the table. I usually welcome them right in and invite them to take a look at my models are answer any questions about the game.

Walking over and plopping your kid on the table in the middle of a game is an absolute ass movie, gamer or not.

Those attached paint jobs are outstanding too.
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